{"id":1615,"date":"2021-07-29T10:10:38","date_gmt":"2021-07-29T18:10:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/3guysandaflick.com\/?p=1615"},"modified":"2022-05-24T11:52:05","modified_gmt":"2022-05-24T19:52:05","slug":"podcast-25-clerks-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/3guysandaflick.com\/index.php\/2021\/07\/29\/podcast-25-clerks-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Podcast 18: Clerks II"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t<div data-elementor-type=\"wp-post\" data-elementor-id=\"1615\" class=\"elementor elementor-1615\" data-elementor-post-type=\"post\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-d4743c0 elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"d4743c0\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_ob_glider_is_slider&quot;:&quot;no&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-1c5810c\" data-id=\"1c5810c\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_ob_column_hoveranimator&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_column_has_pseudo&quot;:&quot;no&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-5884dd2 ob-harakiri-inherit ob-has-background-overlay elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"5884dd2\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_ob_use_harakiri&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_harakiri_writing_mode&quot;:&quot;inherit&quot;,&quot;_ob_harakiri_text_clip&quot;:&quot;none&quot;,&quot;_ob_widget_stalker_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_poopart_use&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_shadough_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_allow_hoveranimator&quot;:&quot;no&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h4 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Recorded on 6\/10\/202110<\/h4>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-307af5f ob-harakiri-inherit ob-has-background-overlay elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"307af5f\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_ob_use_harakiri&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_harakiri_writing_mode&quot;:&quot;inherit&quot;,&quot;_ob_postman_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_widget_stalker_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_poopart_use&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_shadough_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_allow_hoveranimator&quot;:&quot;no&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<h4>In this episode we review the Kevin Smith movie <strong>Clerks II <\/strong>(2006) starring Jeff Anderson, Brian O&#8217;Halloran, Rosario Dawson and Jason Mewes. WARNING: There will be SPOILERS.<\/h4>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-5c7bd2e ob-harakiri-inherit ob-has-background-overlay elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"5c7bd2e\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_ob_use_harakiri&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_harakiri_writing_mode&quot;:&quot;inherit&quot;,&quot;_ob_harakiri_text_clip&quot;:&quot;none&quot;,&quot;_ob_widget_stalker_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_poopart_use&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_shadough_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_allow_hoveranimator&quot;:&quot;no&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">The 3 Guys Podcast<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-4310365 ob-has-background-overlay elementor-widget elementor-widget-html\" data-id=\"4310365\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_ob_widget_stalker_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_poopart_use&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_shadough_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_allow_hoveranimator&quot;:&quot;no&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"html.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<iframe title=\"Podcast 25: Clerks II\" allowtransparency=\"true\" height=\"150\" width=\"100%\" style=\"border: none; min-width: min(100%, 430px);\" scrolling=\"no\" data-name=\"pb-iframe-player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.podbean.com\/player-v2\/?i=ach6w-10a0298-pb&from=pb6admin&share=1&download=1&rtl=1&fonts=Arial&skin=7762a7&font-color=auto&btn-skin=efc861\"><\/iframe>\r\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-c266607 ob-harakiri-inherit ob-has-background-overlay elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"c266607\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_ob_use_harakiri&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_harakiri_writing_mode&quot;:&quot;inherit&quot;,&quot;_ob_harakiri_text_clip&quot;:&quot;none&quot;,&quot;_ob_widget_stalker_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_poopart_use&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_shadough_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_allow_hoveranimator&quot;:&quot;no&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Notes From The Show<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-c8dc6da ob-harakiri-inherit ob-has-background-overlay elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"c8dc6da\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_ob_use_harakiri&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_harakiri_writing_mode&quot;:&quot;inherit&quot;,&quot;_ob_harakiri_text_clip&quot;:&quot;none&quot;,&quot;_ob_widget_stalker_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_poopart_use&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_shadough_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_allow_hoveranimator&quot;:&quot;no&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">The 3 Guys Rating<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1b9bfb2 elementor--star-style-star_fontawesome ob-has-background-overlay elementor-widget elementor-widget-star-rating\" data-id=\"1b9bfb2\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_ob_widget_stalker_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_poopart_use&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_shadough_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_allow_hoveranimator&quot;:&quot;no&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"star-rating.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-star-rating__wrapper\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-star-rating\" itemtype=\"http:\/\/schema.org\/Rating\" itemscope=\"\" itemprop=\"reviewRating\">\n\t\t\t\t<i class=\"elementor-star-full\" aria-hidden=\"true\">&#xE934;<\/i><i class=\"elementor-star-full\" aria-hidden=\"true\">&#xE934;<\/i><i class=\"elementor-star-full\" aria-hidden=\"true\">&#xE934;<\/i><i class=\"elementor-star-full\" aria-hidden=\"true\">&#xE934;<\/i><i class=\"elementor-star-empty\" aria-hidden=\"true\">&#xE934;<\/i>\t\t\t\t<span itemprop=\"ratingValue\" class=\"elementor-screen-only\">Rated 4 out of 5<\/span>\n\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-779e694 ob-harakiri-inherit ob-has-background-overlay elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"779e694\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_ob_use_harakiri&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_harakiri_writing_mode&quot;:&quot;inherit&quot;,&quot;_ob_harakiri_text_clip&quot;:&quot;none&quot;,&quot;_ob_widget_stalker_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_poopart_use&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_shadough_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_allow_hoveranimator&quot;:&quot;no&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">About The Movie From IMDB<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-b5fac7b ob-has-background-overlay elementor-widget elementor-widget-shortcode\" data-id=\"b5fac7b\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_ob_widget_stalker_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_poopart_use&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_shadough_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_allow_hoveranimator&quot;:&quot;no&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"shortcode.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-shortcode\"><div class=\"imdb_container\">\r\n    <div class=\"imdb_default_title\" style=\"max-width: 670px; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\">\r\n        <div class=\"title\">\r\n            <span class=\"left\"><a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/title\/tt0424345\/\" target=\"_blank\">Clerks II<\/a> <small>(2006)<\/small><\/small>\r\n                <small id=\"genres\">Comedy | 97min | July 21, 2006 (United States)<\/small>\r\n            <\/span>\r\n            <span class=\"right\">\r\n            <img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/3guysandaflick.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/shortcode-imdb\/includes\/assets\/onlystar.png?w=1200&#038;ssl=1\"\/> <span id=\"rating\">7.3<\/span>\r\n            <\/span>\r\n            <div class=\"spacer\" style=\"clear: both;\"><\/div>\r\n        <\/div>\r\n        <div class=\"middle\">\r\n            <div class=\"poster\">\r\n                <a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/title\/tt0424345\/\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BODg1MzY2NDY0OF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNDgyMzQzMQ@@._V1_QL75_UY281_CR0,0,190,281_.jpg\"\/><\/a>\r\n\r\n            <\/div>\r\n            <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/video\/vi2914910489?playlistId=tt0424345&#038;ref_=tt_ov_vi\" target=\"_blank\"><div class=\"video\"\r\n                                    style=\"background: url(https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BNmJkNDE4OTgtOWU0MC00MWQ2LWJmMDAtM2RlNDdhMmYyYzhjXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyNzU1NzE3NTg@._V1_QL75_UX500_CR0,47,500,281_.jpg) no-repeat center center;\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" style=\"\r\n                        display: block;\r\n                        top: 50%; bottom: 50%;\r\n                        margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/3guysandaflick.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/shortcode-imdb\/includes\/assets\/player.png?w=1200&#038;ssl=1\"><\/div><\/a>\r\n                  <div class=\"spacer\" style=\"clear: both;\"><\/div>\r\n            <div class=\"content\">\r\n                <span class=\"crew\"><b>Director:<\/b> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/name\/nm0003620\/?ref_=tt_ov_dr\" target=\"_blank\">Kevin Smith<\/a><\/span><span class=\"crew\"><b>Writer:<\/b> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/name\/nm0003620\/?ref_=tt_ov_wr\" target=\"_blank\">Kevin Smith<\/a><\/span><span class=\"crew\"><b>Stars:<\/b> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_ov_st\" target=\"_blank\">Brian O&#039;Halloran<\/a>, <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_ov_st\" target=\"_blank\">Jeff Anderson<\/a>, <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_ov_st\" target=\"_blank\">Rosario Dawson<\/a><\/span><b>Summary:<\/b> A calamity at Dante and Randal&#039;s shops sends them looking for new horizons, but they ultimately settle at Mooby&#039;s, a fictional fast-food restaurant. Free from his dead-end job and lodged in a new one, Dante begins to break free of his rut, planning to move away with his clingy fianc\u00e9e. He is ready to leave the horrors of minimum-wage New Jersey behind, but Randal, always the more hostile of the two, starts to become overwhelmed by his own rancor. \u2014Anonymous\r\n\r\n            <\/div>\r\n            <div class=\"spacer\" style=\"clear: both;\"><\/div>\r\n        <\/div>\r\n        <div class=\"spacer\" style=\"clear: both;\"><\/div>\r\n        <h3>Photos<\/h3>\r\n                    <div class='images'><div><a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0424345\/mediaviewer\/rm3366426880\/?ref_=tt_md_1\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BMjE0NDA2NDI0Nl5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwNjY1MjQ3._V1_QL75_UY140_CR38,0,140,140_.jpg\" style=\"width: 99px\"\/><\/a><\/div><div><a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0424345\/mediaviewer\/rm3601307904\/?ref_=tt_md_2\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BMTcxOTMyMTY5Ml5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwOTY1MjQ3._V1_QL75_UY140_CR38,0,140,140_.jpg\" style=\"width: 99px\"\/><\/a><\/div><div><a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0424345\/mediaviewer\/rm3567753472\/?ref_=tt_md_3\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BMTIxNDkwMDY3OF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwMzc1MjQ3._V1_QL75_UY140_CR24,0,140,140_.jpg\" style=\"width: 99px\"\/><\/a><\/div><div><a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0424345\/mediaviewer\/rm3550976256\/?ref_=tt_md_4\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BMTc5ODg1NTQzNV5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwNjc1MjQ3._V1_QL75_UY140_CR38,0,140,140_.jpg\" style=\"width: 99px\"\/><\/a><\/div><div><a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0424345\/mediaviewer\/rm3534199040\/?ref_=tt_md_5\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BNjM3NjE5ODI2N15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwOTc1MjQ3._V1_QL75_UY140_CR38,0,140,140_.jpg\" style=\"width: 99px\"\/><\/a><\/div><div><a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0424345\/mediaviewer\/rm3517421824\/?ref_=tt_md_6\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BMTI4NDA4NDg4MV5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwMTg1MjQ3._V1_QL75_UY140_CR38,0,140,140_.jpg\" style=\"width: 99px\"\/><\/a><\/div><\/div>\r\n             <br><a href=\"https:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0424345\/mediaindex\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"padding-left: 10px;\">See all photos >><\/a>   \r\n            <div class=\"spacer\" style=\"clear: both;\"><\/div><br\/><h3>Videos<\/h3>\r\n                    <div class='images'><div><a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/video\/vi2914910489\/?ref_=tt_vi_i_1\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BNmJkNDE4OTgtOWU0MC00MWQ2LWJmMDAtM2RlNDdhMmYyYzhjXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyNzU1NzE3NTg@._V1_QL75_UX500_CR0,47,500,281_.jpg\" style=\"width: 100px\"\/><\/a><\/div><div><a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/video\/vi2738928153\/?ref_=tt_vi_i_2\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BY2NjNDFiZTctYzIzMy00MWFhLTg5YTQtMGViNmY4Y2E3Mzc5XkEyXkFqcGdeQWFsZWxvZw@@._V1_QL75_UX500_CR0,0,500,281_.jpg\" style=\"width: 100px\"\/><\/a><\/div><div><a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/video\/vi2803677721\/?ref_=tt_vi_i_3\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BZGMyMzRkZTYtNGMyNS00MjBiLTgzODYtYzU2M2QxMmUzOTNiXkEyXkFqcGdeQW1hZGV0aXNj._V1_QL75_UX500_CR0,0,500,281_.jpg\" style=\"width: 100px\"\/><\/a><\/div><div><a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BNTYwNTk5NDQtYzg3Zi00NzY0LWFhNzAtODI2MzVhZjcwYzRmXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyODk4OTc3MTY@._V1_QL75_UX380_CR0,36,380,214_.jpg\" style=\"width: 100px\"\/><\/a><\/div><div><a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BMGVjYjE0MGItMmIxYy00NjczLTg5MmQtNjhiMmVjODQzMzVmXkEyXkFqcGdeQWplZmZscA@@._V1_QL75_UX380_CR0,36,380,214_.jpg\" style=\"width: 100px\"\/><\/a><\/div><\/div>\r\n             <br><a href=\"https:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0424345\/videogallery\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"padding-left: 10px;\">See all videos >><\/a>   \r\n            <div class=\"spacer\" style=\"clear: both;\"><\/div><br\/><h3>Cast<\/h3><div class=\"cast\" style=\"background-color:#eeeeee\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168?ref_=tt_cl_t_1\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BZTUyMmI0ZTktNTZhMS00OGIxLWI1MjItOWZjNTZlMjNiMGVmXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyNjg2NjQwMDQ@._V1_QL75_UY140_CR33,0,140,140_.jpg\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168?ref_=tt_cl_t_1\" target=\"_blank\">Brian O&#039;Halloran<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Dante<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879?ref_=tt_cl_t_2\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BNTE2MjI5NjU4OF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwNDA4ODE0._V1_QL75_UX140_CR0,7,140,140_.jpg\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879?ref_=tt_cl_t_2\" target=\"_blank\">Jeff Anderson<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Randal<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\" style=\"background-color:#eeeeee\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257?ref_=tt_cl_t_3\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BNjlhN2YzMDYtOTcxYi00YWIwLTkwNTItNDNlMWY2ZDNkNzA5XkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyMTE1MTYxNDAw._V1_QL75_UX140_CR0,0,140,140_.jpg\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257?ref_=tt_cl_t_3\" target=\"_blank\">Rosario Dawson<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Becky<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939?ref_=tt_cl_t_4\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BMjE4MTU3MDYwNV5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNjQ2OTUwOA@@._V1_QL75_UX140_CR0,11,140,140_.jpg\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939?ref_=tt_cl_t_4\" target=\"_blank\">Jason Mewes<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Jay<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\" style=\"background-color:#eeeeee\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0003620?ref_=tt_cl_t_5\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BMjQ0NzI0ODM2MV5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwMjc3Njg4NTM@._V1_QL75_UX140_CR0,9,140,140_.jpg\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0003620?ref_=tt_cl_t_5\" target=\"_blank\">Kevin Smith<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Silent Bob<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0724593?ref_=tt_cl_t_6\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BNzQ4M2E5ZWYtZjIyMS00ZmNhLWJjN2MtMmEzNzk4OWQ2OTA1XkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyNTU2NDk2Mzg@._V1_QL75_UX140_CR0,12,140,140_.jpg\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0724593?ref_=tt_cl_t_6\" target=\"_blank\">Jake Richardson<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Teen #1<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\" style=\"background-color:#eeeeee\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0839486?ref_=tt_cl_t_7\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BN2JjZmUyZmUtNjQ3MS00NWYwLWE2ZjUtOTM0ODUyZTg3MWUzXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyMTA3NjAxNDU@._V1_QL75_UX140_CR0,12,140,140_.jpg\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0839486?ref_=tt_cl_t_7\" target=\"_blank\">Ethan Suplee<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Teen #2<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm2276385?ref_=tt_cl_t_8\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/G\/01\/imdb\/images\/nopicture\/32x44\/name-2138558783._CB470041625_.png\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm2276385?ref_=tt_cl_t_8\" target=\"_blank\">Rachel Larratt<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Counter Girl with Ear Guy<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\" style=\"background-color:#eeeeee\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm2277474?ref_=tt_cl_t_9\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/G\/01\/imdb\/images\/nopicture\/32x44\/name-2138558783._CB470041625_.png\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm2277474?ref_=tt_cl_t_9\" target=\"_blank\">Shannon Larratt<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Ear Guy<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0777059?ref_=tt_cl_t_10\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BMTY1Njk5MDcwM15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNTUwMjIzMQ@@._V1_QL75_UX140_CR0,0,140,140_.jpg\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0777059?ref_=tt_cl_t_10\" target=\"_blank\">Jennifer Schwalbach Smith<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Emma<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\" style=\"background-color:#eeeeee\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0000255?ref_=tt_cl_t_11\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BMzczNzNiMDAtMmUzZS00MTkwLWIwOTYtNmYyNjg3MTVkNThhXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyMjA4MjI5MTA@._V1_QL75_UX140_CR0,1,140,140_.jpg\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0000255?ref_=tt_cl_t_11\" target=\"_blank\">Ben Affleck<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Gawking Guy<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm2275931?ref_=tt_cl_t_12\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/G\/01\/imdb\/images\/nopicture\/32x44\/name-2138558783._CB470041625_.png\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm2275931?ref_=tt_cl_t_12\" target=\"_blank\">Sarah Ault<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Catholic Schoolgirl<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\" style=\"background-color:#eeeeee\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm2076389?ref_=tt_cl_t_13\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/G\/01\/imdb\/images\/nopicture\/32x44\/name-2138558783._CB470041625_.png\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm2076389?ref_=tt_cl_t_13\" target=\"_blank\">Lalida Sujjavasin<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Catholic Schoolgirl<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470?ref_=tt_cl_t_14\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/G\/01\/imdb\/images\/nopicture\/32x44\/name-2138558783._CB470041625_.png\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470?ref_=tt_cl_t_14\" target=\"_blank\">Trevor Fehrman<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Elias<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\" style=\"background-color:#eeeeee\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1131395?ref_=tt_cl_t_15\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/G\/01\/imdb\/images\/nopicture\/32x44\/name-2138558783._CB470041625_.png\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1131395?ref_=tt_cl_t_15\" target=\"_blank\">Gail Stanley<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Elias&#039; Mom<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm2264491?ref_=tt_cl_t_16\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/G\/01\/imdb\/images\/nopicture\/32x44\/name-2138558783._CB470041625_.png\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm2264491?ref_=tt_cl_t_16\" target=\"_blank\">Bruce Macintosh<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Elias&#039; Dad<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\" style=\"background-color:#eeeeee\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0608714?ref_=tt_cl_t_17\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BMjA5NTg3ODk2Nl5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMDY5NDMxOA@@._V1_QL75_UX140_CR0,3,140,140_.jpg\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0608714?ref_=tt_cl_t_17\" target=\"_blank\">Scott Mosier<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Concerned Father<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><div class=\"cast\">\r\n                                    <div class=\"profile\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858?ref_=tt_cl_t_18\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BYmU0YzNhOTAtMmI5Zi00Y2I4LWIyNjMtZTU1OTM2ODU3MmQ0XkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyMDQwMDg0MA@@._V1_QL75_UX140_CR0,0,140,140_.jpg\"\/><\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858?ref_=tt_cl_t_18\" target=\"_blank\">Kevin Weisman<\/a><\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"seperate\">...<\/div>\r\n                                    <div class=\"char\">Hobbit Lover<\/div>\r\n                                <\/div><br><a href=\"https:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0424345\/fullcredits\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"padding-left: 10px;\">See full cast >><\/a>   \r\n                    <div class=\"spacer\" style=\"clear: both;\"><\/div><hr\/><span class=\"extra\"><b>Countries:<\/b> United States<\/span><span class=\"extra\"><b>Languages:<\/b> English<\/span><span class=\"extra\"><b>Budget:<\/b> $5,000,000 (estimated)<\/span>\r\n        <div class=\"imdb-footer\"><span class=\"imdb_copyright\">Source: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.imdb.com\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"color: #f5c518 !important;\">imdb.com<\/a><\/span><\/div>\r\n    <\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-fa7a0fb ob-harakiri-inherit ob-has-background-overlay elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"fa7a0fb\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_ob_use_harakiri&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_harakiri_writing_mode&quot;:&quot;inherit&quot;,&quot;_ob_harakiri_text_clip&quot;:&quot;none&quot;,&quot;_ob_widget_stalker_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_poopart_use&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_shadough_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_allow_hoveranimator&quot;:&quot;no&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Quotes From The Movie<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-323adbe ob-has-background-overlay elementor-widget elementor-widget-shortcode\" data-id=\"323adbe\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_ob_widget_stalker_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_poopart_use&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_ob_shadough_use&quot;:&quot;no&quot;,&quot;_ob_allow_hoveranimator&quot;:&quot;no&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"shortcode.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-shortcode\"><div class=\"imdb_container\"><div style=\"all: unset\"><div class=\"imdb_transparent\">\r\n    <div class=\"imdb_left\">\r\n        <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0424345\" target=\"_blank\">\r\n            <div class=\"poster_parent\" style=\"\r\n                        background: url(https:\/\/3guysandaflick.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/shortcode-imdb\/includes\/assets\/star.png),\r\n                        url(https:\/\/m.media-amazon.com\/images\/M\/MV5BODg1MzY2NDY0OF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNDgyMzQzMQ@@._V1_QL75_UY281_CR0,0,190,281_.jpg)no-repeat center center;\r\n                        background-size: cover; \r\n                        -webkit-background-size: cover;\r\n                        -moz-background-size: cover;\r\n                        -o-background-size: cover;\r\n                        background-size: cover;\">\r\n                <span id=\"imdb_rating\">7.3<\/span>\r\n            <\/div>\r\n        <\/a>\r\n    <\/div>\r\n    <div class=\"imdb_right\">\r\n        <span id=\"movie_title\"><a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0424345\" target=\"_blank\">Clerks II<small> (2006)<\/small><\/a><\/span>\r\n        <span id=\"genres\">97min | Comedy | July 21, 2006 (United States)<\/span>\r\n        <div class=\"imdb_general\"><span id=\"imdb_general\"><b>Director:<\/b> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/name\/nm0003620\/?ref_=tt_ov_dr\" target=\"_blank\">Kevin Smith<\/a><\/span><span id=\"imdb_general\"><b>Writer:<\/b> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/name\/nm0003620\/?ref_=tt_ov_wr\" target=\"_blank\">Kevin Smith<\/a><\/span><span id=\"imdb_general\"><b>Stars:<\/b> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_ov_st\" target=\"_blank\">Brian O&#039;Halloran<\/a>, <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_ov_st\" target=\"_blank\">Jeff Anderson<\/a>, <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_ov_st\" target=\"_blank\">Rosario Dawson<\/a><\/span><\/div>\r\n        <span id=\"summary\"><b>Summary: <\/b>A calamity at Dante and Randal&#039;s shops sends them looking for new horizons - but they ultimately settle at the fast food empire Mooby&#039;s.<\/span>\r\n        <div class=\"imdb_general\"><span id=\"imdb_general\"><b>Countries:<\/b> United States<\/span><span id=\"imdb_general\"><b>Languages:<\/b> English<\/span><\/div>\r\n        <div class=\"imdb-footer\"><span class=\"imdb_copyright\">Source: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.imdb.com\" target=\"_blank\">imdb.com<\/a><\/span><span style=\"display: none\">Disclaimer: This plugin has been coded to automatically quote data from imdb.com. Not available for any other purpose. All showing data have a link to imdb.com. The user is responsible for any other use or change codes.<\/span><\/div>\r\n    <\/div>\r\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"wrap\"><h2>Quotes<\/h2><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat? What is the big deal? Since when did it become a crime to say porch monkey? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, I don't know, since forever? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhy? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nBecause porch monkey's a racial slur against black people! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nNo it's not! Nigger is. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nRandal! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nDid Randal just call Mr. Dante a nigger? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nShut up, Elias! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI did not just call Dante a nigger, I just said that 'nigger' is a racial slur. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nSo is porch monkey! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, it is not! Coon, spook, spade, moolie, jigaboo, nig-nog; *Those* are racial slurs! Porch monkey is not! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nAll right, look, there's only one \"Return,\" okay, and it ain't \"of the King,\" it's \"of the Jedi.\" <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, Star Wars geek. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, I'm the geek? Look at you two whipping out your preciouses. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nYou'll have to excuse him, he's not \"down\" with the trilogy. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, what the fuck happened to this world? There's only one trilogy, you fucking morons. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nYou know what, maybe we should start calling your friend Padme, because he loves Manakin Skywalker so much, right? <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">in robot voice<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nDanger danger, my name is Anakin. My shitty acting is ruining saga. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">chucking<\/span>]\nYea-Yeah, you're crazy, Jar-Jar. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, I'm crazy? Those fuckin' hobbit movies were boring as hell. All it was, was a bunch of people walking, three movies of people walking to a fucking volcano. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nThanks, Pickle Fucker! <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">to Silent Bob<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nYo, some pickle fucker gave us free eats! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nYou know, sometimes I wish I did a little more with my life instead of hanging out in front of places selling weed and shit. Like, maybe be an animal doctor. Why not me? I like seals and shit. Or maybe an astronaut. Yeah. Like, be the first motherfucker to see a new galaxy, or find a new alien lifeform... and fuck it. And people'd be like, \"There he goes. Homeboy fucked a Martian once.\" <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">about the Go-Karts<\/span>]\nIt just centers me, alright? Kinda the way jerking off at work centers you. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nI only did it that one time. And it wasn't to center me. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah, it was to cum. Well I dunno about you, but cumming centers me. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nThen why did we have to leave work so you can ride the Go-Karts to clear you head? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWell, I don't wanna jerk off in the Mooby's bathroom! What if a customer comes in and my jerking off gets him all sex nuts and retard strong, and suddenly I'm fighting him off as he tries to jam my dick in his mouth! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nThe most likeliest of scenarios. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0843100\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Wife<\/span><\/a>:\nI'm not eating something that was cooked by some cracker-ass hatemonger! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0247456\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Husband<\/span><\/a>:\nI will. Baby, you can't taste racism! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat racism, \"porch monkeys?\" <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0003620\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Silent Bob<\/span><\/a>:\n...I got nothing. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat's the matter with you? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat did I do now? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nThere's a crippled guy who found a way to reach out to a world he feels isolated from and you somehow found a way to take issue with him. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nSure, take his side. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nHave you become so embittered that you now feel the need to attack the handicapped? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat handicap? They guy's just in a wheelchair, it's not like he's Anne Frank or something. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nAnne Frank? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah, Anne Frank. The chick that was all duhhh, till the miracle worker showed up and knocked some smarts into her. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYou're talking about Helen Keller. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nNo I'm not, I'm talking about Anne Frank. She was deaf, dumb and blind. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nNo she wasn't. Helen Keller was deaf, dumb and blind. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nAre you sure? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYup. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nThen who the fuck's Anne Frank? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nAnne Frank's the little girl who hid from the Nazis in a secret room with her family; she wrote a diary. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, yeah. Well, then I guess this guy is like Anne Frank with the diary and all. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nNo, he's like Helen Keller with the handicap, you jerk! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYou always gotta be right, don't you? You Nazi douchebag. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYou're chaos incarnate, man. Our whole lives, you've been getting me into trouble and holding me back! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, I'm holding you back, right? I remember like 10 years ago, the night we went to Julie Dwyer's funeral, you were all like \"I need to shit or get off the pot!\" <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYOU said 'shit or get off the pot', not me. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYou got all fired up about taking charge of your life and what did you do? You worked at the store 'til the place burned down. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nI took courses that broke down! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nAnd dropped out! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nBecause you stopped going! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nBecause we were just killing time with those classes! One semester we took Criminology, for Christ's sakes. What the fuck were we training to be, Batman? <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Jay and Silent Bob smile at each other<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nAt least, we were doing something instead of wasting our lives in some fucking convenience store! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYou know what, you can bad mouth Quick Stop all you want, but I miss that place! I loved working there! I look back at that period as the best time of my life! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">scoffs<\/span>]\nNow I know you're fucking nuts. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhy? Because I enjoyed what I did? I got to watch movies, fuck with assholes, and hang out with my best friend all day. Can you think of a better way to make a living? Yeah, maybe it's not what everyone does, but it was pretty fucking good! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nI'm disgusted and repulsed and... and I can't look away. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhy haven't you fucked Myra yet? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nWell, we can't because of Pillow Pants. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat the fuck's Pillow Pants? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nPillow Pants is a little troll who lives in her pussy. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Randal stares<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nPillow Pants is her pussy troll? <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">scoffs<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nDuh. You know how every girl's parents put a pussy troll in them when the girls are young, to keep them from having premarital sex? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n...Sure. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nWell Myra's is named Pillow Pants. And so even though she totally wants to have sex with me, Myra says if I put my... thing in her, Pillow Pants will bite it off. So, I gotta wait until Pillow Pants gets peed out of her body on her 21st birthday before we can have sex. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">floored<\/span>]\nAnd Myra told you this? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nBoyfriends and girlfriends talk to each other about sex stuff Randal. You'd know this if you ever had a girlfriend. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nHave you and Myra even kissed yet? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nWe would have already if it wasn't for Listerfiend. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">beat<\/span>]\nListerfiend is her mouth troll, isn't it? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">shakes head<\/span>]\nWomen. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhy because I enjoyed what I did? I got to watch movies fuck with assholes and hang out with my best friend all day, can you think of a better way to make a living? Yeah maybe it wasn't what everyone does but it was pretty fucking good. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nSince God created man, and man created the Transformers, the Transformers are like a gift from God, Randal! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nNo sir. They are not a gift from God. They are an unholy curse from the beast we call the Desolate One. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nI don't really want to hear this Randal. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nThe First of the Fallen. The Spoiler of Virgins, the Master of Abortions! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nYou know I don't like to talk about dark forces Randal. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">singing into P.A. microphone<\/span>]\nLet me help you out of your chair, Grandma! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">climbing through the drive-thru window<\/span>]\nGrandma what was it like? To be on that holiday site <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nLate that night I awoke from my sleep. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nHearing! Unknown! Voices! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>,\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nLaughing insane! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0724593\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #1<\/span><\/a>:\nYou guys holding? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nShit, everything but coke, heroin and your cock. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0839486\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #2<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0724593\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #1<\/span><\/a>:\nHow 'bout a nickel bag, man? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">singing<\/span>]\nOh, fifteen bucks, little man, put that shit in my hand. Nong, nong, ning-a ning-a nong nong! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0724593\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #1<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">to friend<\/span>]\nHe likes to sing. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0839486\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #2<\/span><\/a>:\nIs that a fucking Bible? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nHey hey, the HOLY fucking Bible, son. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">Dante, Randal, Jay, Silent Bob, Elias and the Sexy Stud have been taken to a holding cell<\/span>]\nJail cell design hasn't changed much in centuries, has it? Maybe it's time they brought in the laser bars, or something. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, they can make a hard plastic cage like Magneto's in X-Men 2! Nauw. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nCome on, dude, let's keep it in the real world, alright? But you know what wouldn't be a bad idea? Carbonite. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Silent Bob points and nods in agreement<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat do you think, Dante? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">Dante looks up and glares at him, then charges at Randal, slamming him into the bars<\/span>]\nI think I'm gonna kill you! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat up, steel cage match! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYou ruined my life! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYour life was already ruined! <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">shoves Dante away<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nJesus! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat were you thinking? A fuckin' Donkey show? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nIt was your going away present! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">sarcastic<\/span>]\nSure was! I never thought I'd be going away to prison! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1018295\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Sexy Stud<\/span><\/a>:\nBoys? You can't be imprisoned for watching an inter-species sex act. You'll walk. The worst I'll get is a huge fine for animal abuse, and alot of disgusted looks from ass-wipe conservatives who can't appreciate sexual exploration. Hey! <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">as he drops into his seat in the jail cell, sighing sadly as he leans back against the bars<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1018295\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Sexy Stud<\/span><\/a>:\nI miss my donkey. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nI can't believe you. I finally get my shit together. I'm hours from getting outta here, and really starting my life, and you somehow figure out a way to obliterate all that and reduce me to a convict <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh yeah, it's my fault that your life's so fucked up! I'm the engaged guy who knocked up my boss! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nYou knocked up the guy that owns Mooby's? Ew! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">chuckles, and then incredulous<\/span>]\nWhat? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">at Jay<\/span>]\nWould you shut up? <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nLet me tell you something. If Peter Jackson really wanted to blow me away with those Rings movies, he would've ended the third movie on the logical closure point, NOT the 25 endings that followed! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat's the \"logical closure point\"? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah, friend, enlighten us <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhen fuckin' Frido wakes up from his little comer, or whatever, and all the other hobbits are jumpin' on his bed. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">squinting his eyes<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nAnd then Sam leans in the doorway and gives him this very fucking gay look. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nNot The Rings, Randal! Say what you will about Jesus, but leave The Rings out of this! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">getting angry<\/span>]\nI'm gonna kick your ass back to The Shire if you don't shut your fucking mouth. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nThat look was so gay. I thought Sam was gonna tell the little hobbits to take a walk so he could saunter over to Frodo and suck his fucking cock. Now THAT would have been an Academy Award worthy ending. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nHey, faggot! They're not gay! They're hobbits! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nAnd then, right after the Sam\/Frodo suckfest, right before the credits roll, Sam fucking flat out bricks in Frodo's mouth. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nI swear- <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">nauseous<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nFuck you! <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">barfs<\/span>]\n<\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nFuck, I had to take a fuckin' order off a guy I blew after Junior Prom, once. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah, I've waited on your brother, too. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nMan, you must love this fucking guy, 'cause he's the biggest pussy I ever met, the dude who lives his life according to everyone else's standards. \"I have to go down to Florida and get married because that what's expected of me.\" And the fucking insane part is, he ain't even crazy about the chick he's marrying or Florida, never mind the fact that he's got a perfectly good chick right here in Jersey who he's nuts about, and even Anne fucking Frank could see she's nuts about him too. And she likes you for who you are, man. She ain't trying to stuff you into a box you'll never fit into, not to mention that she's carrying your hideous fucking chud of a kid. Jesus, if you had any sense whatsoever, you'd fucking stop trying to bray it up with the rest of the sheep and live your life the way it makes sense to you, you fucking ass. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">on the roof about to teach Dante how to dance<\/span>]\nHey, Twelve-Step! <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Jay looks around confused<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nJay! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">looks up<\/span>]\nLord? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nUp here, jackass. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">moves so he can see her<\/span>]\nWhat the fuck are you doing up there? Yo, if you're gonna jump, let me get a crack at that pussy first! Lemme find out. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nYou still got your boombox? <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Silent Bob comes out with the boombox<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nPlay something and turn it way up. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">disappears, then comes back<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nSomething danceable! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nUp here? Are you serious? You're gonna teach me to dance up here? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat? You want I should do it in front of all the customers? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat customers? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nShut up. Come over here. Okay, get ready for the music. You feel it... here. Here it comes. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Heavy Metal begins to play. Jay and Silent Bob headbang and dance furiously<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nSomething a little less demonic, please? <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nSince when did porch monkey suddenly become a racial slur? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nWhen ignorant racists started saying it a hundred years ago! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, bullshit! My grandmother used to call me a porch monkey all the time when I was a kid because I'd sit on the porch and stare at my neighbors! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nDespite the fact that your grandmother might've used it as a term of endearment for you, it's still a racial slur! It'd be like your grandmother calling you a little kike! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, it is not. Plus, my grandmother had nothing but the utmost respect for the Jewish community. When I was a kid she told me to always treat the Jewish kids with the utmost respect, or they'd put the sheni curse on me. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat the fuck, man? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nSheni's a racial slur, too! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, it is not. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYes, it is! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nShe never called any Jews 'sheni', she just used to say sheni curse a lot. It was cute! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nIt wasn't cute! It was racist! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI disagree, man, she was just an old timer, that's the way people talked back then! Didn't mean they were racist... Although my grandmother did refer to a broken beer bottle once as a nigger knife... You know, come to think of it, my grandmother was kind of a racist. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYou think? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWell,I still don't think porch monkey should be considered a racial term. I mean, I've always used it to describe lazy people, not lazy black people! I think if we really tried, we could re-claim it, and save it. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nIt can't be saved, Randal! The sole purpose for its creation, the only reason it exists in the first place, is to disparage an entire race! And even if it could be saved, you can't save it because you're not black! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWell listen to you! Telling me I can't do something because of the color of my skin! You're the racist! I'm taking it back, you watch! <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">customers enter<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nHey, what can I get for you, you little porch monkey? <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">beat<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nIts cool, I'm taking it back. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">after the fire at the Quick Stop<\/span>]\nTerrorists? <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Dante shakes his head<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI left the coffee pot on again, didn't I? <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Dante nods<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nShit! Now where am I gonna bring chicks to fuck when my mom's home? <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nWhoo! We's all gonna get drunk and get laid! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nOh my God, is Elias hammered? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nIsn't it awesome? My man smoked two blunts full of skunk! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nFuck Pillowpants! Honk if you love a lot of pussy! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">looks at Silent Bob<\/span>]\nYo, we love pussy! <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Jay and Silent Bob blow on party favors<\/span>]\n<\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nBefore he was the Mad Ducats guy, he was just Pickle Fucker. You see, freshman year, the seniors would hunt us down and put us through what they called \"initiations.\" They'd stuff us into lockers or throw us in the girl's shower room naked, but Lance here got the worst of it. The seniors yanked down his pants and shoved a pickle up his ass and made him walk ten feet. If the pickle fell out before he hit the ten-foot mark, he had to take a bite of it, re-insert it, and walk again. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nEwwwwww... <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah. But, don't worry. He made it. His pickle was small enough to stay wedged after only four bites. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0005134\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Lance Dowds<\/span><\/a>:\nI'll bet you're the only guy in the world who still remembers that, Graves. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, I bet you still remember it pretty vividly, Pickle Fucker. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0777059\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Emma<\/span><\/a>:\nIt must be nice to have a job with so much downtime. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nDowntime's important. If I had to deal with all the fucking mouthbreathers non-stop without a break, I'd put my head in the deep-fryer. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Dante and Emma stare at him, waiting for him to leave<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nBalls, too... <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">Emma parks her SUV and gets out. Jay and Silent Bob stand in front of the graffiti on the side of the Mooby's - \"Eat pussy.\"<\/span>]\nOh, we *totally* do. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nWhy *do* the Go-Karts help? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI don't know. They just remind me of a better time in my life. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nLike when? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nLike when we were young and the world was still in front of us. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nWe're not that old. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah. But, sometimes I get the feeling the world kinda left us behind a long time ago. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYou know, you can do something about that. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI told you, I don't wanna jerk off in the bathroom at work! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nHey man. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">Puts on Mooby's hat<\/span>]\nWelcome to Mooby's, may I take your order? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah um, let's see... Give me one udderly delicious Moo-ilk shake, Skinny Calf and a, order of onion rings. Thanks. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">Typing into register. To himself:<\/span>]\n\"One ring to rule them all.\" <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">Surprised<\/span>]\n\"One ring to find them.\" <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">Eavesdropping<\/span>]\nOh Jesus. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n\"One ring to bring them all.\" <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\n\"And in the darkness bind them!\" <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">Hi-5's the Hobbit Lover<\/span>]\nYes! How many times? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nUmm, three for 'Fellowship', two for 'Towers', *four* for 'Return'. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">Showing off<\/span>]\nFive for return. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nDude. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOkay, look. There's only one 'Return', okay, and it ain't of 'The King', it's of 'The Jedi'. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">to Elias<\/span>]\nOh, Star Wars geek. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh I'm the geek? Look at you two whipping out your preciouses. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">to Hobbit Lover<\/span>]\nYou'll have to excuse him. He's not 'down' with the trilogy. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, what the fuck happened to this world? There's only one trilogy you fucking morons. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nYou know what, maybe we should start calling your friend Padme, because he loves Mannequin Skywalker so much, right? <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Robotic genstures and monotone, imitating Anakin Skywalker<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nDanger, danger, my name is Anakin. My shitty acting is ruining saga. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">Chuckles<\/span>]\nYeah, you're crazy, Jar-Jar. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh I'm crazy? Those fucking hobbit movies were boring as hell. All it was was a bunch of people walking. Three movies of people walking to a fucking volcano... Here's the first movie... <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Walks in a straight line, doped<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n... And here's the second movie... <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Walks in a straight line and steps<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n... <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nHe is way off. Loser. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n...You ready for the third movie? <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Walks in a straight line again, and, at the end, pretends to take a ring off his finger and throw it away, then shrugs<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1660686\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Diner #1<\/span><\/a>:\nFuckin' A. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">a bunch of cops and fireman run into Mooby's and see the \"interspecies erotica\"<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1446725\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Fireman<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat the fuck? <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">the donkey brays as the Police Officer sees Randal's \"Porch Monkey 4 Life\" shirt<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0724656\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Officer<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">shouting<\/span>]\nPORCH MONKEY? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, no no, it's cool, I'm taking it back. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYou wouldn't wanna be with a girl with an oversized clit? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nNo, 'cause the next step is a guy with an undersized dick. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nI'm gonna kick your ass back to the Shire if you don't shut your fucking mouth. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">describing the Lord of the Rings Trilogy<\/span>]\nHere's the first movie. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">walks a few steps, staring blankly<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nAnd here's the second movie. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">walks a few steps again, pretends to trip<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nHe is way off, loser. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYou ready for the third movie? <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">walks yet again, stops, pretends to throw the ring into the volcano. Shrugs his shoulders and turns around<\/span>]\n<\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">pause in dancing as he dips her; to Becky<\/span>]\nI love you, Becky. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nI'm pregnant, Dante. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Dante drops Becky<\/span>]\n<\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nChicks dig Lord of the Rings, Randal. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nShyeah, the kind of chicks into swords and elves and shit, and I wouldn't fuck them with the Torch of Gondor. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, you're so gross! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI know you've given a blowjob, right? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nI haven't even put my purse down, yet. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nThat's a yes. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">to Dante<\/span>]\nAnd I know you've gone down on chicks. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat's your point? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWell, when you're done chowing down on the no-no parts of your lover you kiss 'em, right? That's just like going ass to mouth. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nOkay, I'm pretty sure you just compared a vagina to an asshole. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nAnd? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nHave you restocked all the napkin holders yet? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nThat's an Elias job! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nThat comparison of pink and brown eyes just made it a Randal job. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nZing! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">to Elias<\/span>]\nShut the fuck up, GoBot! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">to Becky<\/span>]\nI could probably sue this whole corporation right now for sexual harassment. You're just making me restock the napkin holders because of my firmly held beliefs on the subject of ass to mouth. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYou never go ass to mouth! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWould you grow up? <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nI need two Egg-A-Moofins and we're almost out of hash browns. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">On the computer<\/span>]\nHold on. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">Through the P.A. microphone<\/span>]\nNow, Randal! <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Randal finishes typing something and hops back over the counter into the kitchen<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat were you writing over there anyway, your memoirs? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI'm battling this jackass on his blog's message board. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nAbout what? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nAbout how he's got too much free time and no life. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nSo does the guy who's flaming him on his website <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI can't help it, the guy pisses me off. It's this fuck in a wheelchair that's always preying on everyone's sympathies, writing these long diatribes about how he'll never walk again, and how walkers should appreciate the blessings of their functioning legs. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nThat 'diatribes' you call it sounds like some poor, crippled guy pouring out his heart and feelings! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, fuck him, man! Trying to guilt me into walking around more because *he's* all gimped out? Kind of mindfuck is that shit? So I've been getting into it with him, throwing it right back in his stupid crippie-boy face about how I love to just sit around, and how I'd rather drive to the end of the block than walk! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nThe guy's in a wheelchair. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah. That's why I called him \"crippie-boy.\" <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm2276385\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Counter Girl with Ear Guy<\/span><\/a>:\nYou fuckin' freak. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">pulls boyfriend by loop in ear<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI'm not even gonna point out the irony, here. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nEmma, are you like this 'cause you have an unnaturally large clit? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0777059\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Emma<\/span><\/a>:\nYou just *had* to tell him, didn't ya? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nIt kinda came out one day! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nHe says it's so big it's almost like a little cock, which says all kinds of weird things about him that I don't even wanna think about. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">to Emma<\/span>]\nYou became persona non-nookie to me the minute he started diddling your pooter. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0777059\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Emma<\/span><\/a>:\nSo thinking of me in terms of being a girl kind of creeps you out, does it? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nSweetheart, I don't think of you in terms of being a girl, I don't think of you in any way... <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Emma lifts up her shirt<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, that was just *wrong*. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0777059\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Emma<\/span><\/a>:\nIf you don't get the fuck out of here so that I can spend some quality time with my man, next I'm gonna show you my pooter. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhy would you wanna do something like that? <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Emma unbuckles her belt<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nAlright, alright, I'm leaving! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">removing a smoking black basket of fries<\/span>]\nI don't think these look right. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nJesus! Step away from the fryer before you burn us all alive! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nIt's not my fault you abandoned your post! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWas it too much to ask that you handle the fries? The machine does all the work! What's a machine gotta transform into some giant fuckin' robot before you'll take it seriously? Go home! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nThat's bestiality, Randal! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nAt its finest, I hope. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nWho would want to see something like that? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nMe, Dante, *you*. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nI don't wanna see something like that! Why would you wanna see something like that? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nBecause it's fucked up! And, I wanna see if a chick with a mouth full of donkey spunk swallows. Alright, here we go. Kinky Kelly and the Sexy Stud. Straight from their dirty debut in Tijuana, Kelly's taking it on the road. Taking it in the ass, that is. You gotta give it up for Oscar Wilde-like wordplay that good. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nDo they show pictures? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOnly one of Kinky Kelly sucking off Optimus Prime. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nReally? <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Randal hits Elias<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nOw. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nLemme borrow your cell phone. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">nervously<\/span>]\nOh... 'Cause I'm only supposed to use it to call my parents in case of an emergency. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nThis is an emergency. We gotta lock up Kinky Kelly for tonight so we can give Mr. Dante a memorable send off. You love Mr. Dante, don'tcha? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nIn a non-gay way. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0777059\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Emma<\/span><\/a>:\nCome outside with me, I've got a surprise for you! <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Emma and Dante run outside and pass Jay, posing completely naked<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nThat's my surprise? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0777059\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Emma<\/span><\/a>:\nNo. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nYou should read your Bible, sirs. You'll find all types of weird shit in there. Like, did you know Jesus was a Jew? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0839486\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #2<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">pause<\/span>]\nYeah. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nHow the fuck do you always have like two good-looking girls who want you? You're the most hideous fucking chud I've ever met, and you always have a pair of girls fighting over you. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYou swung at me! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYou ducked. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nBecause you swung at me! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">after Silent Bob hands Jay a Redbull, Jay drinks it and kicks it in the air<\/span>]\nGet the FUCK outta here! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">to Dante<\/span>]\nYou're my best friend, and I love you... In a totally heterosexual way. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">to Silent Bob<\/span>]\nYeah, right. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1018295\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Sexy Stud<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">as the cops pull up<\/span>]\nOh, shit! Not again! Gotta finish! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nLadies and gentlemen, and you, Elias! Straight from the debauchery capital of the world, Tijuana Mexico! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, God, no. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, God, yes! <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">snaps his fingers and an incredibly elaborate lighting set-up is activated<\/span>]\n<\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nSeventeen year olds nowadays are crazy. They're up for anything. They even like it when you go ass to mouth. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, my God. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nAre you serious? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI don't fuck around when it comes to ass to mouth. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYou never go ass to mouth! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nIt's never my idea! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat's the point in having an Internet connection if you're not using it to look up weird, fucked-up pictures of dirty sex you'll never have yourself? <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">about Becky<\/span>]\nNo, we had sex one night after work a few weeks ago. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat? Where? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nHere, on the prep station table. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nEw, that's my prep table. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nIf Peter Jackson really wanted to blow me away with those \"Rings\" movies, he would have ended the third one on the logical closure point, not the 25 endings that followed. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nEven the fuckin' trees walked in those movies. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI'd buy the Quick Stop and reopen it myself. That's what I'd do. That's what we should do. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">getting Gawking Guy's attention from watching Dante and Emma make out behind the counter<\/span>]\nAvert your eyes, ya' perv! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0000255\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Gawking Guy<\/span><\/a>:\nNot very hygienic. That's all I'm gonna tell you. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYou're gonna be rolling in the pussy, man! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nDon't be gross! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nSays the guy who was just playing tonsil hockey with his mother. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nThe best part of this job is all the barely legal pussy that comes in here. And they all look up to me 'cause I've got a driver's license. It's awesome. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nYou know, sometimes I wish I'd done a little more with my life instead of hangin' out in front of places, selling weed and shit. Like maybe be an animal doctor. Why not me? I like seals and shit. Or maybe be an astronaut. Yeah. And be the first motherfucker to see a new galaxy. Or find a new alien life form... And fuck it. And people would be like \"There he goes. Homeboy fucked a martian once.\" <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Silent Bob looks at him weirdly, before two teenage drug buyers start to approach them<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nHoly shit out first customers since our triumph of return, act cool. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0724593\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #1<\/span><\/a>:\nYou guys holdin'? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah, everything but coke, heroin and your cock. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0839486\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #2<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0724593\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #1<\/span><\/a>:\nHow about a nicklebag? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">Improvised rapping<\/span>]\nOh, fifteen bucks little man, put that shit in my hand. Nong-nong-nonga-nonga-nong-nong. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Teen #2 gives Silent Bob $15, who exchanges it for a nicklebag of weed<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0724593\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #1<\/span><\/a>:\nSo, ahh, haven't seen you guys in a while. Where've you been all this time? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nMe and Silent Bob finally bought a car. We're cruising down to the boardwalk, fuckin' middle-town cop pulls us over for suspicion of mischief. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0724593\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #1<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat the fuck's that mean? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nDrivin' around with a deployed airbag. Cops pull us over, they find two pounds of Jamaican Landswolf. Prosecutor wants to put us away for a dime but the judge gives us rehab instead. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0724593\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #1<\/span><\/a>:\nShit, rehab? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nYep yep. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0839486\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #2<\/span><\/a>:\nHow long were you in? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nSix months, sir. We got six months and two days on the wagon, as a good friend of Bill W's. Check it out. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Holds up rehab token<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nJust got it two days ago, before we got out. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0839486\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #2<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah but if you're holdin' all the time, aren't you gonna be tempted to get high? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, not with the power of Christ on my side, sir. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Silent Bob holds up a Holy Bible<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0839486\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #2<\/span><\/a>:\nIs that a fucking Bible? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nHey, hey, the Holy fucking Bible, son. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0839486\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #2<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">to Teen #1<\/span>]\nWhat the fuck kinda song-bird Jesus-freak dealers d'you bring me to? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0724593\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #1<\/span><\/a>:\nI like them, man. They're funny. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0839486\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #2<\/span><\/a>:\nThey're fuckin' stupid. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nYou should read your Bible, sirs. You'll find all types of weird shit in there. Like did you know Jesus was a Jew? <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nI can't believe you. I finally get my shit together. I'm hours from getting outta here, and really starting my life, and you somehow figure out a way to obliterate all that and reduce me to a convict. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, yeah, it's my fault your life's fucked up. \"I'm the engaged guy who knocked up my boss!\" <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">amazed<\/span>]\nYou knocked up the guy who owns Mooby's? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">chuckles, and then incredulous<\/span>]\nWhat? <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">last lines<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYou know something? You're not even supposed to be here today! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nRandal... <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Holds up onion ring<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n\"One ring to rule them all.\" <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nAnd you wonder why no chick'll let you stick your cock in her. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nI never wondered that. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah, 'cause you've accepted the fact that you'll never get a chick a long time ago. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nI could get a chick if I wanted. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWho are you kidding? You can't get a chick ya mook, you're too weird and sad. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">Throws down onion ring and storms up to Randal<\/span>]\nI turn down chicks left and right. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYour chicks are your \"left\" and \"right.\" <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah right, what do you know? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nAhh, I know that you're a huge fucking nerd of Potsie-like proportions, and no chicks dig nerds. Especially nerds that are into Lord of the Rings. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nChicks dig Lord of the Rings, Randal. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah. The kind of chicks that are into swords and elves and shit, and I wouldn't fuck them with the torch of Gondor. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, you're so gross! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nThe best part of this job is all the barely legal pussy that comes in here. And they all look up to me 'cause I've got a driver's license. It's awesome. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYou're thirty-three. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYou show me one thirty-three year old chick who's buck wild in bed as your seventeen year old counterpie. Seventeen year olds nowadays are crazy. They even like it when you go ass-to-mouth. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nOh... My... God. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nAre you serious? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI don't fuck around when it comes to ass-to-mouth. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYou never go ass-to-mouth. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nIt's never my idea. These young girls, they get all horned up and they tell you to go ass-to-mouth. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYou never go ass-to-mouth, Randal. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYou sound like my Mom. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Becky enters<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nBecks, do you ever go ass-to-mouth? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nYou never go ass-to-mouth. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYou've never gone ass-to-mouth. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYou never go ass-to-mouth. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nI've never gone ass to mouth. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nNot even once? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nNot even ever. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYou're both so repressive. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">to Becky<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nAlright look, I know you've given a blowjob, right? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nI haven't even put my purse down yet. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nThat's a yes. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">to Dante<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nAnd I know you've gone down on chicks. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat's your point? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWell, when you're done chowin' down on the no-no parts of your lover, you kiss 'em, right? That's just like going ass to mouth. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nOkay, I'm pretty sure you just compared a vagina to an ass hole. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYou guys would be willing to lend us some of that money, so we could reopen the stores? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nSure, on two conditions. One, we can hang out in front of the store any time we want and you can't call the cops. And two, you have to blow each other and we get to watch. Then, you have to go ass to mouth. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Dante, Randal, and Silent Bob give Jay a weirded out look<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nAlright, just the first condition. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">to Dante<\/span>]\nSometimes, in the heat of the moment, it's forgivable to go ass to mouth. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">chuckling<\/span>]\nHeh. I knew it. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1018295\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Sexy Stud<\/span><\/a>:\nSo, where're we doin' this thing? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, right inside the restaurant. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1018295\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Sexy Stud<\/span><\/a>:\nYou're kidding. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nNot spacious enough? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1018295\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Sexy Stud<\/span><\/a>:\nNo, it's plenty spacious, just kinda weird, isn't it? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nKinda weird? You're in the bestiality business, dude. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1018295\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Sexy Stud<\/span><\/a>:\nHey, Fucko, we like to call it inter-species erotica. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nIntriguing. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nThat guy's being awfully forward with that donkey. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0005134\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Lance Dowds<\/span><\/a>:\nRandal Graves. You work here, too? Jesus, anybody else from our graduating class back there? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWell well well... Pickle Fucker. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0247456\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Husband<\/span><\/a>:\nRemember, you saved. You don't use that kinda language. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0843100\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Wife<\/span><\/a>:\nAin't nobody from my church in here. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nSay what you will about Jesus, but leave the \"Rings\" out of this. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nWhere the fuck did you guys go? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nYou don't wanna know. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nWell, I know it's your last day and all, but while you're still on the clock, could you at least pretend that you still give a shit? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nDon't blame this guy! Some cock stain we went to high school with showed up to remind us that we're fucking failures, so I wanted to get out of here to blow off some steam if you must know! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0843100\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Wife<\/span><\/a>:\nDid he say 'cock stain'? What the fuck is cock stain? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0247456\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Husband<\/span><\/a>:\nI don't know. That's some white freaky stuff. White boys get white women to do everything. You wanna do a cock stain? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nDo you know how often I've had people I went to high school with come in here? Fuck, I had to take an order off a guy I blew after Junior Prom. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah, I waited on your brother, too. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nYo, you guys are gonna miss this shit! The big guy's gonna cornhole that ass! With his wiener! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">to Dante<\/span>]\nHold that thought. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Jay hands Emma a cake<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nQuick, hit that two-timing fuck with this! <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">she hits Dante with the cake<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nHey, you wanna go out some time? <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">last lines<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nCan you feel it? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nFeel what? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nToday is the first day of the rest of our lives. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nWe need to talk. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">referring to the donkey<\/span>]\nDid you see the size of that cock? <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">while masturbating<\/span>]\nI'm sorry, Jesus! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Randal bursts into the office<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">laughing<\/span>]\nI made fun of \"Lord of the Rings\" so hard, it made some supergeek puke all over the counter. Where do we keep the mop and bucket so I can have Elias clean it up? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nIn the closet, with the rest of the cleaning products. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWe have cleaning products? <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Randal shuts the door<\/span>]\n<\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nEase up, Pillow Pants. The dude's not into your D&amp;D GoBots bullshit. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nEmma, I don't - I don't know what to say. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0777059\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Emma<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">on the verge of tears<\/span>]\nTake him, fucking whore. <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">throws her ring at Becky<\/span>]\n<\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">mumbling<\/span>]\n\"One Ring to rule them all.\" <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\n\"One Ring to find them.\" <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, Jesus. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">pulls a Ring necklace out of his shirt<\/span>]\n\"One Ring to bring them all.\" <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">pulls a Ring out of his pocket, in a dramatic voice<\/span>]\n\"And in the darkness, bind them!\" <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">dancing to \"Goodbye, Horses\"<\/span>]\nWould you fuck me?... I'd fuck me... I'd fuck me hard... <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nHow many times? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nWell, um, three for \"Fellowship,\" two for \"Towers,\" four for \"Return.\" <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nFive for \"Return\"! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0918858\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Hobbit Lover<\/span><\/a>:\nDude! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nAs you know, my online handle is Optimus Prime. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI know that, I wish I didn't. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nI'm having second thoughts. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nAbout your sexuality? <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nYou weren't the one that got mayo in your cooch. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI got to rent movies, fuck with assholes, and hang out with my best friend, Dante. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYou can't get a chick, ya mook. You're too weird and sad. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">gets angry<\/span>]\nI turn down chicks left and right. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYour chicks *are* your left and right. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">Elias is wasted<\/span>]\nI hope that donkey doesn't have a heinie troll! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYo, Freddy fucking Mercury! Where's Kelly? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1018295\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Sexy Stud<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">pointing at the donkey<\/span>]\nRight here! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI thought that's the sexy stud. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1018295\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Sexy Stud<\/span><\/a>:\n*I'm* the sexy stud. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nBut this donkey is a dude! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1018295\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Sexy Stud<\/span><\/a>:\nKelly can be a guy's name too. Hey! <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Randal shrugs and sits down<\/span>]\n<\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1018295\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Sexy Stud<\/span><\/a>:\nWhen it's over, if you want, you can fuck Kelly. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nReally? Sweet! <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1018295\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Sexy Stud<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1018295\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Sexy Stud<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">as he drops into his seat in the jail cell, sighing sadly as he leans back against the bars<\/span>]\nI miss my donkey. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">to Jay<\/span>]\nI have a huge boner right now! <\/p><p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">Jay smiles nervously at him<\/span>]\n<\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nIf he's gonna jerk off, I'm gonna jerk off, too <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI don't think he's gonna jerk off. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nMay your first child be a masculine child! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm1018295\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Sexy Stud<\/span><\/a>:\nOoh, cake! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">after Emma flashes Randal<\/span>]\nWhat'd you do that for? You realize he just thinks you're trying to get him into a threeway with us now, don't you? <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nHow the fuck did you father a child with a chick that's not your fianc\u00e9? Holy shit, she got pregnant off the toilet seat you jerked off onto! I fucking knew it! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0724593\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #1<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">about Jay and Silent Bob<\/span>]\nI like 'em man, they're funny. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0839486\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Teen #2<\/span><\/a>:\nThey're fucking stupid. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nThe Transformers were a total slight against God. In as much as God sent his only begotten son to die on the cross to redeem mankind and all we did to pay him back was make terrible fucking cartoons, like the Transformers. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nWhat kinda sick fuck gets turned on watching a guy fuck a donkey? <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nDo we have a mop? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah it's in the closet with the other cleaning supplies. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nWe have cleaning supplies? <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">watching Dante propose to Becky<\/span>]\nOne ring to rule them all! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI don't mind people snickering at the stupid uniform I've gotta wear, but I'll be damned if I let some self-righteous lucky turd come in here and treat me and Dante like we're a couple of fucking porch monkeys! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nWell, I mean, as you know, my online handle is Optimus Prime. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI know that. I wish I didn't. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nI thought you weren't even allowed to watch a lot of TV in your house cause you're all Christian and shit. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nWell, as it turns out, cars and trucks that turn into robots aren't really that blasphemous. Because my pastor says that machines can turn into other machines and it's not a slight against God. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nTransformers are a TOTAL slight against God. Inasmuch as God sent his only begotten son to die on the cross to redeem mankind, and all we did to pay him back was make terrible fucking cartoons like the Transformers. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nDude, I'm pretty sure your old lady wants to get you and me together in a three-way! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0206257\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Becky<\/span><\/a>:\nWhile you guys were gone I had to wait on a guy I gave a blow-job to when I was in 9th grade. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah, I've waited on your brother before, too. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0608714\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Concerned Father<\/span><\/a>:\nDon't look at his wee-wee. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\nI was outside taking a piss when I heard the news, congrats! <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">Taking 'I Eat Cock' sign off of his employee of the month picture; to Randal<\/span>]\nWell, at least you spelled cock right this time. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYou ever see a chick give a mule a blowjob? <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\nI mean, you already taught me how to dance at a wedding. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n[<span class=\"fine\">first lines<\/span>]\n<\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0641168\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Dante Hicks<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">on his cellphone<\/span>]\nYeah, I got a fire at the Quick Stop. Yeah. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nAnd you wonder why no chick will let you stick your cock in her. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nI never wondered that. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nOh, sick burn. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nDude, the Transformers sucked. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0270470\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Elias<\/span><\/a>:\nOh no they didn't, they're more than meets the eye! They could blow the pants off Ranger Danger any day. <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0026879\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Randal Graves<\/span><\/a>:\nYeah, I'll lose sleep whether you'll write about that or not. <\/p>    <\/div><hr\/><div class=\"imdb_quote\">\n<p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0582939\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Jay<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">while eating food that has piss and flies<\/span>]\nThis tastes like piss and flies, doesn't it? <\/p><p>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/imdb.com\/name\/nm0003620\/?ref_=tt_trv_qu\"><span class=\"character\">Silent Bob<\/span><\/a>:\n[<span class=\"fine\">nods<\/span>]\n<\/p>    <\/div><\/div><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In this episode we review the Kevin Smith movie Clerks II (2006) starring Jeff Anderson, Brian O&#8217;Halloran, Rosario Dawson and Jason Mewes. WARNING: There will be SPOILERS.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1601,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"elementor_theme","format":"standard","meta":{"sfsi_plus_gutenberg_text_before_share":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_show_text_before_share":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_icon_type":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_icon_alignemt":"","sfsi_plus_gutenburg_max_per_row":"","episode_type":"audio","audio_file":"https:\/\/mcdn.podbean.com\/mf\/web\/6g7sy4\/Clerks_2ampi1.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"","filesize":"","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":"","itunes_episode_number":"","itunes_title":"","itunes_season_number":"","itunes_episode_type":"","filesize_raw":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[32,35],"tags":[],"series":[75],"class_list":["post-1615","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-movies","category-podcasting","series-default-podcast"],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/3guysandaflick.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/clerks2_5.png","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/3guysandaflick.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/seriously-simple-podcasting\/assets\/images\/no-album-art.png","download_link":"https:\/\/3guysandaflick.com\/podcast-download\/1615\/podcast-25-clerks-2","player_link":"https:\/\/3guysandaflick.com\/podcast-player\/1615\/podcast-25-clerks-2","audio_player":"<a class=\"wp-embedded-audio\" href=\"https:\/\/3guysandaflick.com\/podcast-player\/1615\/podcast-25-clerks-2\">https:\/\/3guysandaflick.com\/podcast-player\/1615\/podcast-25-clerks-2<\/a>","episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/3-guys-and-a-flick-movie-reviews\/id1554911182","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.google.com\/feed\/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkLnBvZGJlYW4uY29tL3RocmVlZ3V5c2FuZGFmbGljay9mZWVkLnhtbA","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"podbean":{"key":"podbean","url":"https:\/\/threeguysandaflick.podbean.com\/","label":"Podbean","class":"podbean","icon":"podbean.png"},"podchaser":{"key":"podchaser","url":"https:\/\/www.podchaser.com\/podcasts\/3-guys-and-a-flick-movie-revie-1784960","label":"Podchaser","class":"podchaser","icon":"podchaser.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/3izS6keyh6J84wM3lmqNam","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"stitcher":{"key":"stitcher","url":"https:\/\/www.stitcher.com\/podcast\/3-guys-and-a-flick","label":"Stitcher","class":"stitcher","icon":"stitcher.png"},"itunes":{"key":"itunes","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/3-guys-and-a-flick-movie-reviews\/id1554911182","label":"iTunes","class":"itunes","icon":"itunes.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/3guysandaflick.com\/feed\/podcast\/default-podcast","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"q4Gwtg4P8q\"><a href=\"https:\/\/3guysandaflick.com\/index.php\/2021\/07\/29\/podcast-25-clerks-2\/\">Podcast 18: Clerks II<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/3guysandaflick.com\/index.php\/2021\/07\/29\/podcast-25-clerks-2\/embed\/#?secret=q4Gwtg4P8q\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Podcast 18: Clerks II&#8221; &#8212; 3 Guys and A Flick\" data-secret=\"q4Gwtg4P8q\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script type=\"text\/javascript\">\n\/* <![CDATA[ *\/\n\/*! 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