Young Josh, Billy: The space goes down, down baby, down, down the roller coaster. Sweet, sweet baby, sweet, sweet, don't let me go. Shimmy, shimmy, cocoa pop. Shimmy, shimmy, rock. Shimmy, shimmy, cocoa pop. Shimmy, shimmy, rock. I met a girlfriend - a triscuit. She said, a triscuit - a biscuit. Ice cream, soda pop, vanilla on the top. Ooh, Shelly's out, walking down the street, ten times a week. I read it. I said it. I stole my momma's credit. I'm cool. I'm hot. Sock me in the stomach three more times.

Susan: I'm not so sure we should do this.

Josh: Do what?

Susan: Well, I like you, and I want to spend the night with you.

Josh: Do you mean sleep over?

Susan: Well, yeah.

Josh: OK... but I get to be on top.

Josh: Will you please leave? I got a deadline to meet. Gosh.

Billy: Who the fuck do you think you are ?

Josh: *Hey*!

Billy: You're Josh Baskin, remember? You broke your arm on my roof! You hid in *my* basement when Robert Dyson was about to rip your head off!

Josh: You don't get it, do you? This is important!

Billy: I'm your best friend. What's more important than that, huh?

[Turns to leave]

Billy: And I'm three months older than you are, *asshole*!

Interviewer: Where did you go to school?

Josh: It was called George Washington.

Interviewer: Oh G.W. My brother-in-law got his doctorate there. Did you pledge?

Josh: Yes. Every morning.

Scotty Brennen: See that girl over there in the red? Say "hi" to her and she's yours. She'll have her legs around you so tight you'll be begging for mercy.

Josh: Well, I'll stay away from her, then.

Josh: My best sport is video hockey.

Paul: That isn't a sport.

Josh: Well, It takes eye-to-hand coordination.

Paul: It's not a sport if you don't sweat.

Josh: Well, what about golf? You don't sweat and that's a sport.

Paul: It's not a sport if you let a machine do all the work.

Josh: What about car racing?

Paul: Aw, shut up, Baskin!

Paul: What is so special about Baskin?

Susan: He's a grown up.

Mrs. Baskin: You have my son?

Josh: [Over the phone] Yes.

Mrs. Baskin: Look, if you touch one hair on his head, I swear I will spend the rest of my life making sure you suffer.

Josh: Wow, thanks.

Josh: It's a glow-in-the-dark compass ring. So you don't get lost.

Josh: What's this?

Scotty Brennen: Pay day.

Josh: [Opens up the envelope and looks at his check] *A hundred and eighty seven dollars*?

Scotty Brennen: Yeah. They really screw you don't they?

MacMillan: You can't see this on a marketing report.

Josh: Um, what's a marketing report?

MacMillan: Exactly.

Susan: All he said was he didn't get it.

Paul: [Mimicking Josh] "I don't get it." "I don't get it." "Let's make it a bug."

Susan: It happened again. David, the girl is absolutely useless. You've gotta get me someone who knows what she is doing. Excuse me. I'm not getting any of my mail, nothing has been filed. Ever since she got engaged, my life has been a disaster.

Personnel Director: You know, she came so highly recommended.

Susan: She spent the last three months writing down her married name. "Mrs. Judy Hicks", "Mrs. Donald Hicks"; "Mrs. Judy Mitchellson Hicks", sometimes with a hyphen, sometimes without a hyphen. Sometimes, she spells the hyphen.

Billy: [noticing a dingy hotel that says "St. James"] This one looks all right.

Josh: No, it doesn't.

Billy: St. James, Josh! It's religious.

Bank Teller: [cashing Josh's first paycheck] Okay, so how would you like that?

Josh: [he and Billy discuss it privately, then return to the window] Three dimes, a hundred dollar bill and 87 ones.

Bank Teller: [pause] Okay...

[takes out stack of $1 bills]

Bank Teller: One, two, three, four...

Josh: [playing racketball] That was under the line.

Paul: What?

Josh: That was under the line. You said it had to be over the line on a serve.

Paul: No, I didn't.

Josh: Yeah you did. You said it had to be over the line on a serve.

Paul: No I did not, now give me the goddamn ball!

Josh: Well that's cheating.

Paul: Give me the goddamn ball, will you?

Josh: No.

Paul: Give me the ball, you little shit.

Josh: It's my serve.

Paul: Give me the ball! *Give me the goddamn ball*! I never said that!

Josh: Yes you did.

Paul: Give me the...

[Josh starts to run, Paul gives chase]

Paul: Give me the... Give me the ball. Give me the ball!

Josh: [looking around St. James hotel room] I can't sleep here.

Billy: Maybe it's better if you don't

Young Josh: I wish I were big.

Susan: [talking work at the office party] I thought if we could get everyone together.

MacMillan: Susan, have a drink. Have a couple of drinks. It's a party.

Billy: I'd use the chain if I were you.

Josh: [checking Billy's baseball cards] Got it, got it, need it, got it...

MacMillan: Boss needs to be knocked on his ass every once in a while.

Josh: [inputting toy orders] The Dinky Link... Jimmy's Toy Box...

Scotty Brennen: [in the next cubicle] Psst, hey, I'm Scott Brennan.

Josh: I'm Josh Baskin.

Scotty Brennen: Listen, what're you tryin' to do, get us all fired? You gotta pace yourself, slowly, slowly.

Josh: It's my first day.

Scotty Brennen: I know!

Billy: So you got a job, where you play with all these toys.

Josh: Yup!

Billy: And they're gonna pay you for that!

Josh: Yup!

Billy: SUCKERS!

MacMillan: You can't keep a kid from growing up. All a 13-year-old boy wants is a 13-year-old girl. And I sure don't know how to build one of those.

Billy: [about the luxuries in Josh's office] You're the luckiest guy I know!

[Josh plays with a punching hand puppet until he hits himself]

Man with beard on street: *Fine*! Fine. Fine. Fine, fine! Kill the bitch. Kill the bitch. Kill her with a knife. Kill the bitch. Put it in. Bitch! Kill the bitch! Kill her!

Motel Clerk: Hey Angel, get out of that bathroom now.