Sho'nuff: Am I the meanest?

Sho'nuff 's Goons: Sho'nuff!

Sho'nuff: Am I the prettiest?

Sho'nuff 's Goons: Sho'nuff!

Sho'nuff: Am I the baddest mofo low down around this town?

Sho'nuff 's Goons: Sho'nuff!

Sho'nuff: Well who am I?

Sho'nuff 's Goons: Sho'nuff!

Sho'nuff: Who am I?

Sho'nuff 's Goons: Sho'nuff!

Sho'nuff: I can't hear you...

Sho'nuff 's Goons: Sho'nuff!

Sho'nuff: Well, well, well. If it ain't the serious, elusive Leroy Green. I've been waiting a long time for this, Leroy. I am sick of hearing these bullshit Superman stories about the - Wassah! - legendary Bruce Leroy catching bullets with his teeth. Catches bullets with his teeth? Nigga please.

Leroy Green: The secret awaits eyes unclouded by ambition.

Sho'nuff: WHAT?

Leroy Green: Those who are bound by desire see only that which can be held in their hands.

Sho'nuff: See, now it is mumbo jumbo like that, and skinny little lizards like you thinkin' they the last dragon that gives kung-fu a bad name. Get up, Leroy, I got somethin' real fo' yo' ass in these hands.

Sho'nuff: [to Leroy] Kiss my Converse!

Eddie Arcadian: Where are you gonna go, Angie? Without me, you're nothing! Without that outfit, you're just another no-talent dental hygiene school drop-out from Kew Gardens getting by on her tits!

Angela Viracco: And in the end, Eddie, you know what? You're nothing but a misguided midget asshole with dreams of ruling the world. Yeah, also from Kew Gardens. And also getting by on my tits.

Laura Charles: I thought that maybe it would be a great idea if I got myself a bodyguard. You know, like someone to guard my body? What girl could do worse that to have her own real life kung fu master?

Leroy Green: I am no master.

Laura Charles: You sure look like a master to me.

Sho'nuff: Alright, Leroy, who's the one and only master?

Leroy Green: I am.

Daddy Green: Just direct-a your feets-a to Daddy Green's Pizza!

Eddie Arcadian: [to Angela] Don't bug me, fix your face.

[during the fight in the movie theatre]

Transvestite: Don't hurt that face, baby!

Sho'nuff: [Arcadian has just offered Sho'nuff a briefcase full of money to kill Leroy] Keep your money. You just get that sucker to the designated place at the designated time, and I will gladly designate his ass... for dismemberment!

Eddie Arcadian: Yeah! Hey! Well, whatever! Any way you want to do it. It'll certainly be my pleasure, Mr. Nuff.

Leroy Green: Hey my man, what it look like?

Johnny Yu: Well, you see, Leroy, uh... you know how you're always teaching us to master "the art of fighting without fighting"?

[Leroy nods]

Johnny Yu: Well, I did you one better. I mastered "the art of fighting... without knowing how to fight".

Johnny Yu: You see, people... people are afraid of oriental dudes. Give 'em a little move, a little scream, and lotsa attitude. Check this out.

[Johnny flails around move after move through the air with no intended target in sight making sounds like a Bruce Lee movie, then one of the other students kicks him in the head, knocking him face down on the floor]

Leroy Green: Johnny, to seek safety, one must go into the heart of danger.

Johnny Yu: [Rolls over to look up at Leroy] Huh?

Leroy Green: I do not even have a paint brush.

Sho'nuff: The Shogun is back on the scene, and the Shogun is the master!

Theater Patron: Why don't you sit down and shut up?

Sho'nuff: What? Why don't I sit down and what?

Theater Patron: I said why you don't you sit down and shut up?

Sho'nuff: Why don't anybody who wants me to sit down and shut up come down here and make me? Why don't any fifty of you who wants me to sit down and shut up come down here just for the fun of it?

Richie Green: [after seeing Leroy kissing Laura] I'm gonna slap that sucker silly with a suit for alienation of affection! If it wasn't for me, he wouldn't even know who she was! Chocolate-covered yellow peril!

Eddie Arcadian: I applaud you, Leroy. That was a great finish. Not quite the ending I had in mind, but it was a great finish. You see a .45 will put an end to all this kung fu crap. All it takes is one little bullet. So take your final bow, scum sucker.

[Leroy's eyes widen anticipating the shot, Arcadian fires]

Disco Kid: [sees Laura kissing Leroy] Yo, man, check out the cornball!

Richie Green: He ain't no cornball! He's my brother. And he's the master.

[Leroy apparently "defeated" Sho'nuff, but then...]

Sho'nuff: Leroy!

[Leroy turns to see that Sho'nuff disappeared. He searches around for him. Just then, a low ominous tone reveals that...]

Sho'nuff: Yeah...

[Sho'nuff is now pulsing with the power of "The Glow", albeit an evil one]

Sho'nuff: [sneers to Leroy] Playtime's over, boy.

[a enraged and frustrated Sho'nuff lifts Leroy up from a barrel of water as he was drowning him to force Leroy to acknowledge him as "The Master"]

Sho'nuff: All right, Leroy. Who's the one-and-only Master?

Leroy Green: [rejuvenated] I am.

Sho'nuff: [screaming] AAAH!

[Sho'nuff, furious at Leroy for the "wrong answer", attempts to give him a fatal blow, but the punch is blocked by Leroy, who now has "The Glow" of power for the good; Sho'nuff groans in pain]

Leroy Green: [glowing in gold] I am.

Sho'nuff: [Leroy grabs and starts crushing Sho'nuff's left knuckles as Eddie watches in total shock; groaning in pain] What the... oh, shit... oh, goddamn!

[Leroy laughs as Sho'nuff's power is severely drained]

Sho'nuff: Let me go, motherfucker! Let me go!

[Sho'nuff finally releases himself from Leroy, who now uses "The Glow" to spin around his arms as he readies himself to take Sho'nuff on]

Eddie Arcadian: [shocked] Holy shit!

Sho'nuff: I'm gonna get you, Leroy, because I am the Shogun! I will not rest until everybody knows the Shogun is the master!

Sho'nuff: [to Leroy] Now, when I say, "Who's da mastah?" you say, "Sho'nuff!"

Angela Viracco: Oh Eddie, you're all wet!

Richie Green: [about Leroy] I'm tellin' you, pop. The boy's an awkward. Stupid old clothes, won't mess with no babes... People talk, you know.

Mama Green: Richard, leave your brother alone.

Richie Green: I can't help it if he's weird. You're weird, man! Really weird!

Sho'nuff: [Twisting challenger's foot] YOU'LL... NEVER... USE... THIS... FOOT... AGAIN!

[bites challenger's ankle]

Leroy Green: Sometimes it is hard to live the way of the wise.

Leroy Green: [Throws a dart at Eddie Arcadian and hits an object near Eddie's face] Next time I will not miss

Eddie Arcadian: [Eddie fires a couple of shots at Leroy] Next time I won't miss either!

Sho'nuff: Come on, Leroy. Teach me something.

Sho'nuff: Get him, girls! Maybe you can get a rise out of this limp wimp.